Burn

The other day I was thinking about "the call of god".

(Disclaimer: I don't know what I'm talking about! I'm not a theologian or anything. these are just my thoughts.)

I was just thinking about how this has played into my life (though it is a short one, so far), and that sort of thing. It is something that I have thought about quite a bit. especially over the last year or so. But this morning I realized something that I think might be key. I realized that every time in my life that I have heard God "calling" me, it is not when I'm striving to hear from Him.

I suppose to some extent, I am always striving to hear Him, So maybe I should specify what I mean. I guess I should say, obsessing about making plans, and almost worrying about what it is I should be doing with my life. Obsessions don't do us much good in this life (unless it is about God).

But anywho, I was realizing that the times when I feel the most called to do something, it is not when I'm asking him to, but when I'm simply focusing on Him, and trying my best to love Him, and those around me. Then I thought about this analogy. Its pretty a pretty commonly used parallel, but it fit here, too.

Ok, so you know how the bible says that we are the light of the world? well, it's true. I see it like this: Every person in the world is like a tea candle. But at first, we are not lit. we just wander around in the dark, bumping into other unlit tea candles. And God is like the sun. But he is So bright, and hot, that he can't really reveal Him self to us, except in small doses. So, one day, he sent a match along (Jesus), so that some of us could be lit, and in turn light up others.

So, you might ask, "how dose this relate at all to God will for our lives?" Well, you see, even after we are lit, our flame is pretty small. We can only illuminate a small area around us. Just one tea candle in a dark room does not do much. You need allot of them to really be affective. So God who is light, and is the only one who knows all of the little lights, -lit and unlit- sometimes brings many of them together, and makes a bonfire, and turns a bunch of tiny flames into something more. But we are small, and without him, are just stumbling around, only aware of our own little circles of light. we can't see the big picture, that is a darkened world. when we try to seek out the bonfire that he has for us on our own, we fail. but if we just focus on burning as bright as we can, while keeping in mind that it is His light, and not our own, then he will lead us to where we need to be. He can and will-if we let him- do great things with us.

... So go little candles, and burn for the one who lit you.

Wake up, oh sleepers.

I have spoken to many of you (the faithful readers of my scatter-headed thoughts) concerning the last semester. but I do believe that it is time I write about it. I seems like this will make it more official (though I know it won't). This is the story.

To begin with, I was asleep. Spiritually, that is. And I see that now, because I am awake. I find it odd how perfect this analogy fits my recant life.
As with real sleep, I can't put my finger on when it was, exactly that I fell asleep, but the important thing about it is that it happened. I didn't realize that I was asleep (again, like with the real thing) until I was stating to be woken up. that, in the end, is the better story. For you see, the sleep was very, for lack of a better word, sleepy. I didn't really do much. I went to school, I hung out with my friends, and went to church. The same things as always. But there was some sort of lag, or loll that hung about me. I think that it may be one of those things that you can't really understand fully until it is experienced first hand. But don't try to experience it. it is not the sort of thing that you want to try and understand just for the sake of understanding it.

This state of life continued for quite some time. I did learn things. I did grow. but it was not because I was trying to. I just seemed to fall into things, and then God would use them. looking back, every situation in which I learned things, was a bit dream like. Not in the way that it feels like it was dream, but more like I didn't really know what was happening. I was aware of what I was doing, but only like you are in dreams. Just going about, getting done what needs to get done, and then (seemingly) aimlessly wandering.

It is an unfathomably good thing that God is bigger than us, though. He woke me up. You know how, sometimes, words or phrases follow you, so to speak? well the whole time that I was "asleep", there was this phrase in my head, "wake up, oh sleeper." now remember that this meant nothing to me, as I didn't know that I was asleep. But it kept on popping up. Another thing that is noteworthy, is that there was a verse, too. But with it, I think that I was following it, albeit blindly as much as it followed me. I liked it without reason. (other than that it was the word of God...) It was really just one bit, really. but it also seemed prominent. "Walk as children of light."

I will not go into full detail here, about the waking up proses, but I will do my best to sum it up. The first few times that I heard ( and I mean, really head) the words, "Wake up oh sleeper." It didn't really wake. But that doesn't mean that it didn't help. Though I didn't wake up, did discover that I was asleep, and had been for some time, and needed to awaken. Then, Slowly but surely, it started. I began to see and feel things again. And most of all, I began to want to seek God, and his purpose for my life.

So that is my past four and a half months in a nut shell. And I am glad to say that I'm awake. things are not perfect. I'm a bit groggy, and my eyes are still blurry with sleep, but I'm up, and moving, and walking. And that it good.

Guys, please don't let me forget about this. More importantly, don't let me forget that It was God who did the waking. Not me.

The End

p.s. I for got to say that the two little followers, (wake up oh sleeper, & walk as children of light) happen to be right next to each other, in Ephesians 5 (8-13).

We, the Hopefull Young

I picked up the book, Do Hard Thing today. I hadn't read it in quite some time.I really like that book. This is something that it said that caught me.

...Could it be that teenagers today are faced with a unique opportunity to do hard things-not just as individuals, but as a generation? And not just any hard things but big history-shaping ones? To put it another way, could it be that our particular crop of young people has been placed on earth at this pivotal time in history for a reason

It goes on to talk about the fact that this generation of young people faces allot of challenges, but don't get discouraged as others might.
I had been thinking about this exact thing just before I picked up the book. Maybe it's just me, but it seems like our generation is meant to do and be more. I don't really know what I mean by "more". more of what? I really cant say, but I have felt for some time (after watching my older siblings and their friends grow up,) that I, along with the majority of my age group was different in some way. I can't pinpoint it, but the difference is there.(or at least it is to me.)

I really want to know what other people think about this, so if you have something to say, please tell me! I really want to hear it. I want to know if you guys see our world drastically changing before your eyes, or if I'm just crazy. I have seen it for a while. Things are changing. I know that that really isn't saying allot due to the fact that our world is constantly changing all around us. but thing are becoming...different. that is the only word that I cant think of to say it.

Sometimes i get the feeling that it could all be wishful thinking. Why, you may ask? Well I will tell you. and I will do this using some quotes (that I found while reading my New International Dictionary of Quotations!).

"Youth is easily deceived because it is quick to hope"
-Aristotle

"Youth is a period of missed opportunities."
-Cyril Connolly

"Youth it quick in feeling but weak in judgment."
-Homer

"The American ideal is youth-handsome, empty youth."
-Henry Miller

Now I know that not all of these are true, but things of this nature seem to be prevalent in the view point of many. This makes me so incredibly thankful for two things. One; all of my young friend that are not empty, and Two; all of those in my life who see us youth as more, and encourage us to be more. We couldn't thank them enough for not giving up on us.

So, goodbye, and let me know what you think about this.

The start of something new

The holidays are officially over. And I'm actually ready for the new semester to start. I don't start school for a while, so if you have any suggestions of what I should fill my days with lemme know! I think I'm so ready because things seem to be better. the sleep seems to be over. but maybe it is just the holiday, and winterfest talking. Maybe once the routine starts back up, things will fade back into the monotony that they were such a short time ago... I sure hope not. Not that it was awful, but it was not as good, not as deep as it could have bee. But God used it for his glory none the less. because He is bigger. And will always be so. That is what we must focus on. That will hold us together.